Monday, October 18, 2010

Life On The FOB: Part IV - The Quest For The Clean Latrine

There is a spreadsheet that I keep on my laptop that counts down the time left on deployment.  It gives you the months, weeks, days, hours, minutes, and seconds remaining along with clever commentary to mark the milestones. 

The Quest Defined
Lately, it has been asking how many steps to the latines? Think the designer has been here himself?  Well the answer in our case is 65.

But the far more pressing question is how many steps to the clean latrines?  This is because the holy grail of FOB life is a clean place to sit and do your business.  Unfortunately, finding such a place is a more arduous task than you might imagine because, the clean latrine, as with any journey, is more an ephemeral state of being than an actual destination. 

Chivalrous Latrine Etiquette

Yet in spite of manipulating cleaning schedules, utilizing cipher locks, and threatening guard duties, we have thus far failed.  Nevertheless being dedicated knights, the quest continues. We are undaunted until we have scoured the four corners of the FOB.  For as a wise person once told me "Nothing worth doing comes easy."  And rest assured that once the prize is found, we will be delighted to share it with dozens of our closest noble friends.

Move Along, Lancelot

1 comment:

  1. When winter comes, I suppose the Holy Grail will shift from cleanest to closest. But enjoy the cleanest (if such truly exists) while the weather is still decent.